Friday, January 11, 2013

Light in the Dark

     What a gloomy day outside and probably in. Rained all night long, hard and heavy. So, of course, I was drawn to the Psalms again, to take me out of this gloomy day, which is also hard on me physically. Having OA and Fibro is not fun; nor this mystery disease which causes my body to jerk and spasm unexpectedly. Like the other night when my whole body lifted off the bed while I was trying to fall asleep, twice. I jerked, like a seizure, from head to foot which lifted me off the bed and scared the bejeebers out of me, causing my heart to race, so I had to wait until that settled before I could drift off again. Just another day in paradise. That is what this place is, right? The 'golden years' are not golden: they're steel. Steel rusts and falls apart. The real golden years are when you are able to do anything without pain being attached to it.

    Walking is barely tolerable, while running, especially on the track, is out of the question. I cannot even lift my feet up off the ground, so jumping rope is out of the question, too. While I was never much into weight lifting, it wouldn't have done me any good now, because a gallon of milk is sometimes too hard to lift. There are days I just tilt it over the shelf in the fridge to pout it into my waiting glass, which is sometimes held in a shaky hand. I am 53. But my body behaves as if it were 103. What's up with that?

    Well, as I understand it, God has allowed these illnesses into my life that He may be able to fulfill His purpose for me through it. When I first got sick, I couldn't walk. My knee and my hip prevented me from walking without pain or support. That was the OA. Nothing led up to it; it just happened. Granted, I had been falling down quite a bit since May of that year (2007), but not hard enough to get hurt. I was just getting dizzy and falling down. Even walking up some stairs. The boys and I had walked to the local museum to just hang out together and as I grabbed hold of the hand rail to climb the stairs, I got dizzy and slammed into them, face first. I was just shaken up a bit and a little embarrassed to have my kids see me fall like that. But I just brushed it off and continued climbing. We were able to enjoy the rest of our time at the museum.

     But while we were there, it began to really pour, so we could not leave the building and enjoy the rest of the harborfront the way we had intended to; Steve, my husband, came and picked us up for the ride home. I never went to the doctor for the dizzy spells until after I couldn't walk. But no doctor in any field could help me. Even the neurologists I ended up seeing could not help with the dizziness or shaking or spasms that were, and still are, happening to me.  But God is gracious. Because of the diagnosis Mystery Disease and the diagnosis from SS's own shrink that I was depressed, got me onto SSD within six months after I applied. God still had His hand on my life even then and was watching out for me.

     Even in my darkest hours, whether gloomy of weather or gloomy of thought, GOD is right there with me, next to me, around me, under me and above me. GOD is my Defence: He protects me from the onslaughts of the enemy without. GOD is my Refuge: He is my hiding place and my shelter. He is my happy place. He is my Light and my driving force that keeps me going regardless of what comes against me. And why does so much keep coming against me? To drive me away from His side; to cause me to doubt what I believe is real and truth. The devil's only weapon is deception. His statements are lies and illusions. To believe the devil's words are to doubt GOD's Words. I believe GOD.

    

    


As God is my Rock, my Refuge, my Defence and The Light of my heart, I share His Light of Love and Mercy with a dark and dying world; a world without hope needs the Hope of Salvation through Jesus Christ to get them through the even darker hours that are ahead for this world. Not just my country, USA, but all nations. Jesus died for the whole world, not just the western civilizations who live in comfort for the most part.

There are hundreds of languages, including localized dialects, that have not received a Bible in their own language yet. There are thousands, if not millions, who do not believe God's Word is relevant in today's world, that it is an outdated history book, if not outright fairy tale. These people live in darkness and need the Light of  Christ to shine from us into their lives. Person to person would be nice, but most of us cannot afford to travel outside our cities, much less leave our country to make our homes in another one.

You who have the Light of Christ are the Salt of the earth. You both reveal who Jesus is and why He died to your family and friends. You are the missionary. Your job is to tell your best friend, who might not be saved or born again into God's family, about Jesus. With Love, not with hate or judgment.. Your job is to show Jesus by your actions and your attitudes. My job is the same. The Bible says they who follow Christ fully have been made ministers: we minister to the needs of the unsaved around us, that they might see Jesus in us. And want what we have: knowledge and hope. So many of our friends do not have knowledge and hope in this life, much less after they die.

It is our responsibility, our privilege, our honor and our glory to not only share the love of God with someone, but to see them accept, believe and begin to follow and grow their own seeds of faith in God through Christ. We lead people to Jesus: But JESUS SAVES.

Jesus told His disciples, 'No longer do I call you servants, but now I call you friends.' Why did He say that? Because they were now serving Him with hearts of love. They wanted to help Him accomplish His goals. They wanted to help Him serve. He knew their hearts and that they served with love. Even Judas was referred to at this time, and one other, as friend. God knows your hearts, you who serve Him faithfully, and await His return with great expectation and joy. You, He calls 'friends'. No longer am I a servant only in God's kingdom, but I am a friend. I am a friend of God. I am salt and light. I show you Jesus, that you might thirst for this Savior of mine. I share you Jesus that you might crave the light of His love, with the same enthusiasm you greet a candle or flashlight, when the power goes out or gets shut off.

There you stand in your dark room, plagued by thoughts of doubt and fear. What will you do next? I give you Jesus. What will you do with Jesus? I will love Him and share Him and make Him happy with not only my obedience, but my willingness to hear His voice speak through His Word and His Spirit, who guides me through every path on which God directs my steps. Regardless of the bumps in the road or the sharp turns or the crazy winding curves. I will follow Jesus. Come, and follow Jesus with me. Let us be friends of God together. Let us join our two lights and create a greater light to shine in the dark, thereby bringing more people into His light and His mercy.


 

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